Put Your Spouse First

There’s a weird myth out there that once kids come into the picture, your spouse should take a backseat as you both give your all to take care of the kids. Have you heard this before?

Now, this is a well-intentioned approach to family life. Kids do require a ton of time, attention, energy, and love - and rightfully so!!

7 years into marriage, we’ve acquired three children of our own that are so beautiful, so young, and oh so attached. 🤪  If we aren’t intentional with our time, it’s all too easy for us to make our every waking moment all about them.

But statistics are showing that too many marriages are suffering (or ending!) when children become the primary focus in the home, instead of the marriage. 

This might be an unpopular opinion, but we feel this myth about putting your kids first really needs to go.

Do a little myth busting with us, won’t you?

MYTH: Putting your spouse before your kids is selfish and bad for your kids. 

FACT: Putting your spouse before your kids is the best order for *everyone* in the family. You, your spouse, AND your kids.

FACT: Your kids will thrive MORE when they know the safety and peace of your strong marriage.

FACT: Your marriage is the foundation of your home. If the foundation is weak, everything else is weak. 

FACT: You will be married longer than you have kids in the home. Prioritizing your marriage now ensures a strong marriage when the kids have moved away.

FACT: Your kids need an example of strong married love to influence their own marriage one day.

FACT: You can be an amazing parent for your kids while also being an amazing spouse. 

Putting your spouse before your kids is not selfish. 

It’s a right-ordered action that benefits the whole family. 

So next time you step away from the kids for a weekend, or an evening, (or even just turn on the TV for the kids for 20 minutes) so that you can pour into the heart of your spouse, there’s no need to feel guilty.

Everyone will thrive when your marriage is strong.

Just wanted to send that little encouragement you way today, friends.

You're in our prayers!

Jesse & Kathleen